The Infiltration...

I return once again to update the world on my quest to become the greatest pokemon master... wait, wrong blog... the greatest game designer in the world. Anyway, today's developments include a tour of Bioware, offered up from some extended, extended family.

My current tour of duty, includes working the stockroom at HMV, playing Neverwinter Nights and Diablo 2 (in the little spare time I have) and working on a module for the writer position at Bioware. I have much more experience with writing than I do animating, and thus feel more comfortable and confident in my work. Sadly, I have limited experience with the NWN Toolset and playing the game is helping me out a bit in understanding how they do things. I wish there was a toolset class, but I'm sure the world wide web won't let me down... as it does so often.

My character in NWN is probably my favorite persona I've taken up in a role playing setting. He is a kleptomaniac who must steal first, ask questions later. Yeah, I've received some ray of frost discipline from the party mage, but I'm innocent. It's my hands that are guilty! My bag of holding is being put to wonderful use although I've always wondered why you couldn't put a bag of holding into another bag of holding. Would that create some sort of dimensional warp? Anyway I am pretty much earning the party money by pickpocketing during battles and slinking around cracking open chests. It's a great life all in all, but I wish we had more time to play together. Also this is inspiring me to create a 4th Edition D&D campaign, but at the same time I'm afraid of 4th edition. Might have to get over that.

Oh the new Game Design Challenge is about crates... make something to replace them. Sure thing, anyway here are a few of my ideas.

Blobs - Plain and simple, you're on a world and there is experimental goo everywhere. Use it to make stairs, ladders, slides, supports, etc. The goo is also highly flammable and withers away after flames touch it. It also sticks to walls, itself, other characters etc. Not bad for some goo eh?

Trees - Where do crates come from? Trees! And there are trees generally in any environment so why not use them? Maybe not big trees, but they can also be propped up to make walkways, ladders, traps etc.

Psychic Energy - Sci Fi always needs something to do with enhanced mental capabilities. So why not have just concentrations of energy your character can see that can be pushed and altered into shapes your character might have seen allowing for unique puzzles (ex: transform the energy into a sphere, and get it into an air duct and then turn it into a box to clog the air duct or just to stack. )

Magnets! - Everyone loves magnets, just imagine a factory of magnets. Kind of similar properties to the goo, but imagine throwing an intense magnet at an enemy and watching their armor or weapons attach to it.

Anyway until next time, wish me luck!

The Hunt for Freedom...

And thus it has begun, the search for wheels. I have looked on many websites and in many flyers in search of that car that will replace old faithful from Halifax. So far the search has turned up hundreds of lemons as well as liars. 100 dollar car is really 100 a month. Why must they turn this into a house of lies? Why?

On a lighter note the job at HMV rocks, I leave feeling accomplished and don't have to worry about the job until the next day. This is more therapy. Not only that but Astro Boy the full collection is super cheap, and super awesome.

I have also begun the typing of some character descriptions, hopefully later on I will actually put forth some effort into drawing them by hand. I haven't sketched anything in awhile, so I expect that expedition to fail. On a better note, my writing is going awesome and I just need to start compiling it into Neverwinter Nights. I wish there was some kind of class on how to use the toolset builder. I know there's forums to ask questions in, but I seemingly ask the wrong question or ask it the wrong way and offend someone. The internet has no luck left for me.

Oh and one of my characters is a swashbuckling monk who sacrificed his sight for redemption. Reborn as a follower of the Howling Sun, this character dual wields scimitars and wears a bandana to cover his eyes as they don't matter to him anymore. He also wears the emblem of the Howling Sun proudly on his chest as a brand beneath his simple vest. He's my hero, I love his back story. Anyway enough for today!

Torn.

So, in a brief search of the interweb I find myself looking at the usual suspects for jobs. Just for kicks, I check out Sony and Bioware and much to my dismay I find two jobs I have the skill and experience for and one job I just need a written portfolio and/or module in Neverwinter Nights.

The following is my dilemma:

Currently: Employed by HMV Canada, Rate 9.40/hr (roughly 18.5k) having a blast, no customers, guys I work with are awesome. That, and they let us listen to music, huge plus.

Prospects:
1) Job at Sony as a Field Representative, 27-30k, requires car, based out of Calgary 3 hours away. Gas is paid for, but 3 hours away... ugh. I suppose that would depend on the duties, also would have been awesome if the wife had been accepted into school this year in Calgary.
2) Bioware has again posted one of my dream jobs, the coveted "Writer" position. No idea about salary, probably extremely competitive, need to make a 3000 word minimum module. Don't think I have the time to slap an awesome one together before it goes down yet again.
3) Talent Coordinator position is still up at Bioware and I do have the skills required, but I want to make games... not schedule someone else's interview to get the job of their dreams.

I will perform the following in order, and hope and pray the gods shine some luck on me.
1) Sleep.
2) Wake up and bus to work thinking of a story.
3) Work and think of a story.
4) Bus home, narrowing down story ideas.
5) Arrive home, if I have thought of a story begin writing, if not unpack more and continue thinking.
6) Write at least character descriptions tomorrow night, already have an idea for three characters now.

Wish me luck. I almost hope I don't get it right away just so I can continue to settle in and eventually buy a car. That would certainly help.

Return... from the Blackout.

So, the past 10 days have been nuts. I have been lost in Edmonton 3-4 times, once in my own neighborhood, once in downtown Edmonton and twice in the West Edmonton Mall. Fantastic. All in all I still don't have a firm grasp on how things work, but that also might be because I'm still looking around and find myself walking in circles. But enough of that, bring on the updates!

Update 1: I spent exactly one week looking for a job. I could have had a job that pays 40k a year, but have opted for a lesser paying job. Way less. I could have been the Assistant Manager at Michael's Arts and Crafts, but even if they decided they wanted me I didn't want to work there as it seemed 150% commitment and I just want something to pay the bills while I work on a portfolio for Bioware. I currently am expanding my senses with my job at HMV as an inventory guy... I sit out back and ship and receive things. Best part is, I am loving it even for the 9.40/hour. It pays the bills and doesn't follow me home like a rabid zombie.

Update 2: Currently live and work with D&D and Game Nerds. This is good news for my creative juices and potential outlets for creativity. My boss apparently did a jig when I applied. I thought I was awesome... but jig awesome? I had no idea.

Update 3: Sleeping has upgraded from couch cushions on the floor to a mattress on the floor to the eventual queen size sexy mattress which I will sleep on for the entire weekend. Note to self: Need to continue the unpacking.

Update 4: Have read more comics in a short span of time to kill a normal man. It's a good thing I'm abnormal, and absorbed the comics for what they are. I read the entire Fables series by DC Vertigo, Planet Hulk, World War Hulk and many of the Marvel Civil War sidestories. My brain is mush but it's fantastic.

Update 5: Now that I have a job, I'll be looking for a car. I still need to go to the mountains.

Update 6: I just realized I'm sitting on my friend's DS charger. My DS died in the middle of a siege in Puzzle Quest. The DS Must be charged.

Update 7: By the way, I have been without internet for 10 days because we moved from the old residence to the new one kind of suddenly. This delayed the internet and phone being moved over and left me wondering how things were going for all my friends and completely out of touch. I never realized how dependant I've become on this laptop and it's connection to the internet.

Update 8: I should probably sleep eventually.

I think that about sums up how things have been going thus far, I'll be back to updating regularly as soon as possible which probably means now that I have the internet. Also I have to get back into the habit of doing the Design Challenges which I shall post here and my own designs and choices. Anyway thanks for stopping by and more to come!

The Arrival.

So seeing the family all emotional at my departure was hard, but required for the growth I need in my life right now. I have found myself almost avoiding leaving Halifax as I became comfortable. Now I've moved beyond my comfort zone, I'm jobless and have until the end of the month to pay rent. Not nerve wrecking at all.

So as of this moment I've been awake almost 24 hours. 5 am to 1:40 am. Tomorrow my stuff moves into the new place, I just have to meet them there and then I get to begin unpacking. Hopefully by the time the wife comes up, everything will be done (including buying a bed). The rooms have been decided, some touchups will have to be done and the apparent worth for downtown Edmonton for this house is 700k.

Pictures will be up somewhere, I might link them... I'll tell you more later when I'm not drooling from lack of sleep. Wish me luck!

Tim Edwards

24 Hours...

The days have flown by and Friday is upon me. In 24 hours from this moment, I'll be on a plane heading towards Edmonton. A 6 hour flight, Which leaves at 7:20 am and arrives at 9:40 am. Good old time zones completely ruining math. This week has been crammed with love, laughter, old friends, new friends, sleep (surprisingly), lack of eating (nerves), too much fast food, too few home cooked meals and lastly enough things to think about to kill a normal man.

Lucky for me, I'm far from normal. I'll be posting my idea for the One Button FPS Challenge over at GCG once I'm settled in Edmonton. The fear grips me like never before, as I venture into a world of unknowns. No job, No guarantees and No idea where I'll be in one month have me kind of frazzled. I could be working at Bioware, or I could be working at McDonalds. Very opposite ends of my preferred spectrum, but whatever pays the bills at this point will be getting my attention.

Wish me luck, and I will post here again soon. I'll try and be conscious when I do.

Dueling Design Challenges...

Cue the dueling banjos... two design challenges are now running side by side. One at Game Career Guide which was started by James Portnow and is now overseen by the GCG staff, and the new one starting at Edge Magazine's site Next-Gen. You can never have too many challenges. The latest two I might as well link on here.

Game Career Guide's Challenge
Next-Gen/Edge/JP's Challenge

On here I'll be posting my submissions, thought processes behind them, results and then how I could have done better. I'm no expert, but I am working towards it.

JP got to me first, so he gets the top of the post. Check the above link for the actual challenge.

So designing an NPC and Lair, not so much game design. Also, for a 2d fantasy side scrolling MMO. I don't know how JP came up with that idea but I'll explain my inspirations according to his criteria.

• 2d (I always think sprite based when I think 2d)
• A console MMO (Only ones I can think off that did well, Phantasy Star Online and Final Fantasy XI)
• Fantasy themed (Easy Enough, probably look up some WoW, FFXI and D&D monsters for inspiration)
• Side-scrolling (This part threw me for a loop, but I kind of think of this as the battle system from Tales of Phantasia for the SNES)
• Free to play/micro-transaction based (ability to buy weapons, bonus content through real money or just get rid of banner ads)
• Rated Teen

So one thing I've always wanted to see personally was the Gelatinous Cube from good ole D&D days be introcuced into an MMO setting, perhaps in such a way that it could actually suck up characters, so the ones that had the most hate would end up getting sucked in and roatated out once another person got sucked in. Maybe only a 2 or 3 person limit inside the cube at all times and those people wouldn't be able to do anything while in there. So keeping that in mind...

Ancient Gelatinous Mass
In your home city you hear of a monster that has done unspeakable crimes, eaten many townsfolk and caravans and now the Town is paying copius amounts of rewards for whoever can fell the beast (Early on, in a 1-75 game, this would be 20-25 level minimum and maximum). So you gather some parties and decide to go on the hunt. The townsfolk call it Slugula, after an ancient demon slug that secretes acid. Upon arriving in the Cave of Slugula (which is found by accepting the quest and following the slime path from a local campsite), you realize you're up against something huge.

The path to Slugula is long one, plagued with undead newbies and wildlife alike. Nothing like an Undead Killer Rabbit (see: monty python) to spice up the den of a killer slime. Anyway as you traverse the dark cavern you find yourself between multiple paths, dead bodies, even a large killer slug (to throw you off and actually drops an item that can be taken back for reward and a return quest later to kill the ACTUAL threat). The cavern itself is lit with green flames, and slimy everywhere. The finally, the main event. In a huge room, with platforms and the such the large gelatinous ooze sits in rest until someone starts the attack. After the ooze wakes up it sucks up the person with the highest stat average until people start bringing on the hate. When people are attacking the ooze it can attack and suck up at the same time, with AOE attacks of Goo Rain and sucking HP off the people inside. Also while it can be attacked the people on the inside get any AOE or Elemental damage, so hope they have some elemental absorption *hint*hint*. The Gelatinous Goo God should take 30 minutes to beat on average. Here are it's stats!

Gelatinous Goo Of Doom
Attacks:
Melee Hit - The Goo attacks with a long whip like lash. Does a 10% additional goo damage and has a 25% chance of sucking them into the cube.
Whirly Goo - The slime spins causing damage to all within a radius (probably half the width of the slime on either side and the front) cause knockback as well.
Fling - The slime throws one of the members in the cube in a straight line causing damage to all in the path and the person thrown.
Flaming Goo - Retribution attack, if fire is used on the goo (which is it's weakness) it rains down sticky flaming goo on the map that sticks and causes fire damage for a period of time to characters and flames on the ground.
Absorb - The goo will suck health from as many as three people (who ever is in the cube at the time it's used) thus recovering the health at a 1 to 1 ratio.
Entrap - This is the goo's move to suck up whoever has the most hate at any given time, but the goo keeps people inside until it's close enough to use the move.
Slow - Spell, slows down party member actions.

That's it for now, thanks for stopping by! There will be more added later with regard to the Game Career Guide challenge!

Stories, Concepts, Musics.

I am now realizing I've actually discussed nothing creative except the problems I'm having getting into the industry and my own insecurities. Currently I am working on a few projects in my new found spare time, one of which is a board game.

Currently it is easiest related to Chinese Checkers meets Axis and Allies. I've been working on this for quite sometime but never got around to making a professional working prototype. It is a hex based board game, but it's actually lacking the board aspect.

For lack of a better description think of this, you have a deck of hexagon shaped pieces of cardboard and upon each piece is a bunch of different paths. These paths are what actually make up the board of play. Depending on how many are playing there are suggested layouts and game styles. The game styles I will mention here are Capture the Flag and Elimination.

There are 3 types of units for each player, 1 Heavy, 2 Medium and 3 Light. Light units can travel further but attack at half the rate or half the damage. Medium are unhindered, while Heavy move at half the rate but attack at double. Now obviously not all numbers are divided in 2 easily. So you round up. (1 and 2 = 1) (3 and 4 = 2) (5 and 6 = 3).

Capture the flag is simple, your units must make it to other people's home points thus claiming their flag (represented by a colored chip) and return to your base. The person with the highest number of flag claims wins. However if your ship gets attacked and destroyed while carrying the flag the flag remains there until it is picked up by an opponent or yourself again, or landed on by the original owner which immediately returns it to his base.

Elimination is pretty straight forward, last player standing wins. Now this gets tricky if up to 6 people are playing. The home points have to be claimed too but are still in play. Since home points can't attack, any home point lacking a unit can be claimed just by landing on it. Having your home point allows you to revive your ships upon rolling two of any number in a row. Although in elimination after the game starts only one unit is allowed on a home point at any time. Therefore you must remove units before making more come out.

These are just quick summaries of the ideas and concepts. Game play allows for the rotation and flip of the hexagon shaped pieces by sacrificing 1 dice point per rotation (60 degrees or one side) and 3 per flip. The whole point of this was to design a game that would be cheap to make now, but could easily transition into electronic media.

Stay tuned!

The Barrier That Holds...

For the moment, I am unstoppable machine of ideas and stories. I find myself thinking up more than one story idea at a time, and have actually been able to write up to three at the same time. My creative multitasking is far beyond my own comprehension and my memory for dreams, stories, concepts and entire worlds is without fault.

My flaw is only I am holding myself back.

I have a few contacts now that I didn't have before, and when asked if I had gone to the GDC I replied I couldn't afford it, with time and or money. Really, this is half true. I am still paying off school as well as a few other things since I originally wanted to go five years ago... but after thinking about it, I was afraid I'd get a job somewhere other than Canada. Strange, I want to travel the world, but not leave Canada, strange paradox hmm?

I've aged a considerable amount in a short span of time. I've been mature since grade seven, too serious for my own good half the time and always, no matter what I'm doing, find myself in positions of responsibility or being depended on. I don't mind responsibility, but with responsibility comes many other things mostly dependant on where you work. At EB Games for example, work consistantly followed me home. This is one reason I have aged personally. I became frustrated that no matter how many hours I put in, what I accomplished during the day, it was never good enough and I still got calls and emails at home. Ironically I would still one day love to make my cafe, Delta Geeks, where anyone can go and meet other gamers.

I found myself standing in a Coles Bookstore reading a description of who you are if you were born on May fourth. Normally I pass by astrology books without tossing a second glance, yet this tome of descriptions piqued my interests. It was a two page spread for every single day, and when I arrived at my birthdate I was shocked approximately two sentences in. Could this be a coincidence? It had pegged me down to the last detail, almost insultingly so, even saying people born on this day live their lives for others and lose track of themselves in the times leading to unfulfilling lives. Well then. I thought a moment and strangely it sparked a lot of thoughts in the rest of my brain. Normally I imagine things, overactively so, if I am bored or just alone in public. Not the crazy imagining, but things that would be much more interesting than the drab existance here in Halifax. Like for instance, a day after I was nose deep in Oblivion... I was sitting in traffic imagining the opening of an Oblivion gate in the nearby baseball field. *Sigh*

The truth of the matter is I could have gone, just as I could have gone to Edmonton when my best friend left for school after graduation five years ago. I hold myself back, sacfricing what I want for what I think others want. Do I have regrets? ... ... ...Yes. For the first time in many years I have bought more games than I've played, written far less than I've imagined and sacrificed more than I am willing to list. Where am I now? I sit here, in Halifax, preparing the journey to Edmonton in hopes of landing a job at Bioware. What if I'm not their kind of employee? What then? I've limited myself again to where I can go. My wife wishes to go to school in Calgary, so unless I start a business in game creation there, at the very least I'll be in Edmonton... or worse have no idea where I'm going.

Many people scrutinize the fact that I am looking so far ahead that I can see the past. Perhaps this is so. I find myself losing who I am at every turn, every job, every sacrifice. Where am I supposed to be? My entire person wants to make games, creative worlds, stories to which are so uniquely told that the world might not even be ready. What then? What if my grandest of game ideas turns out to be taken terribly? The only game concept drastically different from all other games to date, something that could easily change RPG gaming as it is known today, what if it is only great in my world? Perhaps I think too much, hold back too easily, bite my tongue where I should say the things I mean to say. Perhaps I think far too much where I should act, instead of losing this time. Sorry to bust out the philosophy but the closer I get to my departure from Halifax, the more I reflect on my life here.

More to come.

A Passing Thought.

Hmm, I was just checking out the IGDA website and realized there is a Calgary chapter listed. Also, I checked their website and they are no longer active. Well then... you know what I'm thinking... or maybe not, but I think I might start planning to start up the official Edmonton Chapter of the IGDA. Bioware is right in town, and I could also check out Calgary. Also the University of Alberta has some of the top minds in Canada in AI research and programming development.

Time to put Edmonton on the map of the IGDA and hopefully I'll be able to swing some organization as soon as I get there to rally the troops. I've always wanted to start something, and you have to start somewhere... and I get to network even more! I'll be talking to my partner in crime in Edmonton A.S.A.P. to see if he wants in.

Wish me luck!

The Homestretch...

So another day has passed, and I'm even closer to Edmonton. I feel countdowns are rediculous, however I find myself watching the date unconsiously. Hard to believe that I won't be seeing my wife for three weeks, which I'm still not sure if it's a bad thing or not. Sometimes a break is a nice thing, especially after all the stress of christmas, wedding and now the move.

I signed up for an Edge forum account, and the hopes I'll be moderator of their forum soon enough. Apparently a design challenge may, or may not, be starting up there and I'll do anything to keep my mind sharp. I've been taking part in the Game Design Challenges over at Game Career Guide and I have to say it was a blast right up until James Portnow left it. The Last challenge, entitled "Rename Katamari Damacy" seemed more like a marketing challenge in my mind. I still took part and even made a quick (AKA terrible) photoshop cover for my version, entitled "The Prince and the Starless Sky". The problem with my title is the fact that it lacks the quirky nature of the game, and sounds more like some elementary school book club project rather than a quirky game with strange music and addictive gameplay. The only good thing about my title is it introduces in six words who you are and what the problem is.

Either way the challenges themselves are not the reason I continue to go, but a lot of the discussions in the forums have taught me so much. Not only that but through being kind and courteous and ever helpful on the forums, I was promoted to Moderator and got a few networking contacts out of the deal. Befriending James Portnow was great (because he's a great guy along side the fact he's got amazing advice) and I've made other contacts on there to which are invaluable and if I hadn't joined on, I simply wouldn't have them as contacts.

As I've said previous, I've been researching the industry itself, watching it grow, and trying to find my place in the shuffle of things. I am the kind of guy who shows up early and leaves late, works too many hours and gives 110% constantly. Sadly, this alone won't get me into the industry. I have been looking into other positions (For example, Bioware's Talent Coordinator) that require skills easily trumped by my experience. If I can just get into the building as an employee, my hard work will get me promoted. Although just the other day I was asked... Why Bioware? Well...

Why Bioware?

I have played pretty much every single Bioware game created (I can barely remember MDK 2 and my Laptop barely plays NWN 2) and I have found them to be among the best storytellers in the games industry. Also I find their dedication to polish and story along the same lines as my own expectations. They're a growing company with stations in Edmonton and Austin, so even still they have room for expansion. My only huge gripe is they're now a part of EA, and I just fear that they'll become EA Edmonton and lose their branding. But as with all takeovers, EA has easily brought stability to a great company that may very well take more chances where they couldn't fail before. In regard to that, I definately hope they do take more chances, but still continue their trend of games with high ratings. Also, they are next door to my best friend and still in Canada which is where I would love to stay for a good many years.

I think that's all for todays post other than a quick thanks to everyone who came out to the Surprise party for the wife and I last night. Although the surprise was on you that we showed up early, I still had a great time! Cake for breakfast, lunch and dinner for the next week... mmm, mmm... diabetes here I come.

The Latest, and Greatest!

Well, since the back stock job at Staples my sleeping pattern has been ruined. On a better note, I'm more productive than ever.

I recently let go of the fact that my resume can actually be more than a page long. In fact, now I don't feel as restricted and put more information on there (Feel free to check the link to your right below my picture). I also used the mentioned updated resume to apply for a new position they just added on Bioware's website.

Also, considering I have the next week off I am considering getting a headstart on my strategy board game I've been designing for awhile. I want it to be ready for play testing once I get to Edmonton. I'm going to need to redo the design document, which is literally looseleaf, napkins and some receipt paper.

I am also adding a link to my deviantART account to the left as well, be sure to check out some of my real life sketches. I have no problem drawing from eye to hand but my imagination can't instruct my hand well enough... yet.

So far the last thing I played before sending all my stuff to Edmonton was the entire Dark Brotherhood and Black Hand missions in Oblivion for 360. That was a considerable story with enough twists to make an awesome movie. As a past story teller myself, I can appreciate what the ladies and gentlemen at Bethesda have accomplished with Oblivion. Now I miss the game!

Only 6 more days until I arrive in Edmonton. The first day is a writeoff, but I'll have to be out looking for a job the next two days. I'll be making the trip to Bioware one of those days. Am I nervous? Only like I'm about to wrestle a Grizzly.

Hindsight, Always 20/20.

First post. No pressure. None, none whatsoever.

Allow me to introduce myself. My name is Tim Edwards and I am currently working towards a job in Game Design or Creation. I am scared to death of how different this job will be compared to all of my past jobs. No more do you get training shifts like you would in retail, this is the main event.

Strangely, I realized early on (approximately 13 years old, 10 years ago) that I wanted to do something to create games. I took all this time and researched the industry itself. So instead of actually producing something worthwhile, I now am better suited to give advice despite not being in the industry itself. As strange and ironic as this is, I find myself afraid. I'm afraid of the coming storm.

It is now, as it was then. It all started in my hometown of Sackville. I was having trouble finding a job as apparently I needed experience to get a job. As time passed, I got more and more nervous that I would never get a job. Suddenly, I got a call back. It was a local mall, apparently... they needed an Easter Bunny. Lesson 1, be careful what you wish for; Lesson 2, kids are all crotch height and can run exceedingly fast. After landing the role as E. Bunny, I applied to Burger King where I was dubbed Beethoven for my strange haircut. I took it as a compliment until one day I was told I was actually being made fun of.

After the BK I applied to a movie theatre, for free movies, the ability to work with friends and just to broaden my movie watching horizons. I indeed watched a lot of movies (terrible to amazing ones), worked with friends (got a wife out of the deal too, after 5 years), moved up through the ranks and improved my resume enough to go for something even better. I got bored with my position as Supervisor and applied at EB Games.

EB Games was my calling. I wanted to work there from day 1, but I needed the experience. Now I had the knowledge of games to improve sales at a new store and build my own clientele. Over the course of time, I too moved up here (Sales Grunt -> Assistant Manager -> Manager) and proved that knowing the product was indeed an amazing sales tool. I raised sales $550,000 in the year and a half I was store manager. I had gained a following and was consistantly having people referred to me specifically. This was my proudest moment, but as with all things, my time there got more frustrating. I hit a professional wall and got bored, with no say over how my store looked I became a glorified sales associate who was salaried. Things changed, but rarely for the best, and when I went from making 660k to over the million in an already saturated market only 3 years in... I began to feel closed. I had broken the million, now what? There were more people waiting in line for District Manager than I have a lifespan to wait out so where to now? I tried to set new goals for myself but found the store boring, and I was unchallenged.

I planned a move 3000 kms away from Halifax, to Edmonton in hopes of glory and fame. During the planning I quit EB Games and switched to a night crew at a local Staples. Strangely for me, the job became therapy. I wasn't losing sleep, I was eating three meals a day and I was no longer feeling stressed. All I did was clean, stock shelves, manual labour and meet people. Going from a position of authority to a position where I could just let go was exactly what I needed. I made friends fast, caught on quickly, and learned from watching the more experienced members of our team work. If you need to figure out a way to be efficient, find the boss and watch them work for 15 minutes. All in all, that job sadly ended it's two week term and now I am between a job and the move.

Now I have a week off. I stare into the future fearing this beast called "Game Design." Do I truly have what it takes to become as innovative and as influential as someone like Shigeru Miyamoto? Or will I find my games beside Tim Schafer's games in the bargain bin? I sincerely hope that we both avoid the bins of $10 cult classic titles. But in all seriousness, where do I go from here? I have a diploma in animation, to which I have been told I need to mess around with 3D Studio Max more to develop my own style. I almost feel like I paid for the program and a computer and a piece of paper equivilent to a reciept for my time, effort and money. What did I go to school for then? I only learned how to do the particular tutorial models, not the reasons behind making cuts here, or science behind animations. I am left standing in the sea of hopefuls drowning in potential hires and currently no life preserver is in sight. Here's to hoping I can get a job as anything at Bioware Edmonton.

This is only the beginning of the journey... wish me luck.